My brother got drunk at the seder last year, couldn’t help with the dishes, and I got resentful. How can I get past this so I’m not still mad this Pesach?
I have two brothers (and a host of cousins), so believe me: I get this one. Let me guess … You’re the responsible one, right? Are you also the oldest? These seem to go hand-in-hand in most families, especially if you happen to be the oldest Jewish sister.
Pesach, like any yontiff, is a lot of work. In the 21st century, it should be all hands on deck—boys, girls, sisters, brothers. You may be hosting your own, or helping with the big family gezunta-seder. If your brother imbibed a bit too much last year and shirked his dishwashing duties, hopefully you gave him what-for when he recovered from his Manischewitz hangover the next day. Besides, he was doing his halachic duty to drink good and plenty (four cups plus!), so you can’t lecture him too much.
This year, give him the benefit of the doubt and hope he’ll hold his liquor (mmm, Slivovitz) long enough to be helpful. If not, I suggest spiking his dessert with some serious chrain (horseradish). Hey, what better time to revert to childish bickering than a yontiff family gathering?
Now if you’ll excuse me… It’s Saturday night as I write this, and I have to go clean my fridge 🙂
Hag kasher v’sameach!