The Twin Cities Ownz Chicago: A Midwestern Beatdown

So Jewish blog Oy! Chicago is declaring their city’s superiority over the Gather The Jews in our nation’s capital. I’m not going to let The Windy City off that easy, so here is TC Jewfolk’s stake to the claim of Midwestern dominance.
And if you’re looking for more than 8 reasons, let me know and I’ll give you 8 more.
1. Even with the worst record in the American League last year, the Minnesota Twins have a better chance of winning the World Series in 2012 than the Chicago Cubs. And you are still paying Alfonso Soriano to play the outfield. The Curse of the Billy Goat Lives!
2. According to Fit Pregnancy magazine, Minneapolis/St. Paul is the 3rd best place in America to be pregnant, give birth, and raise a family. What makes it great:

  • The Twin Cities lead the survey in access to children’s hospitals and fertility clinics.
  • Minneapolis also has the most doulas per 1,000 live births of any city in the survey.
  • Almost 22 percent of moms breastfeed for six months or longer (only two cities in the survey have higher success rates).
  • Infant and maternal mortality are low.
  • Minneapolis has the second-highest number of licensed home day-care centers of any city in the survey.
  • It’s also the most affordable city for new parents of any surveyed.

3. Your former Governor (from Chicago) was just sentenced to 14 years in federal prison. But that’s nothing new – three other former Illinois governors have gone to prison. And over the past 40 years, 1,500 people in the Chicago area have been convicted for bribery, extortion, tax fraud, embezzlement, and other forms of corruption.
4. According to Klout, the most influential chef online is none other than Andrew Zimmern. Sure, he won a James Beard Award and he hosts one of the most popular food shows on TV. But more importantly, he writes a column for Mpls./St. Paul Magazine and he’s a Jew who lives right here in the Twin Cities.
5. According to Forbes, the Twin Cities is the healthiest metro in the country (Chicago didn’t even crack the top 20).

  • Minneapolis residents breathe clean air, prioritize exercise and keep their weight down, supported by a city that was among the first to add bike trails and ban smoking in public places.
  • If you live in Minneapolis-St. Paul, you and your neighbors are less likely to have cardiovascular disease, diabetes, and asthma and are more likely to be in excellent or very good health.
  • Minneapolis has lots of open spaces, parks, and walking areas, and you see people walking everywhere.
  • The Twin Cities do their part by setting aside a high percent of the city as parkland, offering plenty of ball fields, tennis courts, playgrounds, dog parks, golf courses, and recreation centers.

6. While Blago tried to sell the vacant seat in Illinois, the state of Minnesota elected a nice Jewish boy from Minneapolis to the United States Senate – Al Franken.
7. According to the U.S. Census, the Chicago-Joliet-Naperville, Ill. metro area has the fourth longest commute time in the country at 30.7 minutes. I’ve lived in the Twin Cities for over 3 years and have never even been in my car for 30.7 minutes at one time – let alone twice a day, 5 days a week.
8. No wonder The Mall of America had 40 million visitors in 2010 – no sales tax on clothes.
(Photo: Many Highways)