TC Jewfolk is excited to announce a new project just in time for Valentine’s Day. Old School Jewish Matchmaking (OSJM) is a program open to singles 65 and over who would like to be fixed up.
Freshly retired from careers in the business world and looking to give back to the community, Char Cohodes and Freddie Weisberg co-founded OSJM as a labor of – and for – love.
“We’re ready to roll,” said Weisberg.
Their roster is now open to Jewfolk of a certain age, as well as those they call “Jewish-adjacent,” people with ties to the community. Seniors looking for a match, or those helping an interested senior, should join our new Facebook Group, Old School Jewish Matchmaking, or email [email protected].
Operating OSJM on a volunteer basis, longtime friends Cohodes and Weisberg view their efforts as part of their personal commitment to tikkun olam, repairing or improving the world. They observed an unmet need in the community, noting that often, seniors view dating websites and apps as unappealing or unsafe.
Enter the Old School part of this new Jewish Matchmaking program. Cohodes and Weisberg conduct personalized intakes with interested participants in order to get to know them. The matchmakers then work together closely and must agree on a potential match before proceeding.
“It’s a community affair,” Weisberg said, invoking the program’s tagline and explaining how their connections to and knowledge of our community inform the project.
“We have consulted with the maven of Jewish matchmaking, Bobbie Goldfarb, who successfully pioneered the Jewish Dating Service, along with Sandy Olken and Judy Dworsky, in the Twin Cities in 1979,” said Weisberg.
Cohodes spent decades as a corporate matchmaker during her career in human resources, pairing individuals with the right workplace. Weisberg witnessed the power of what she calls “a beautiful second act of love” for her father, who met his new partner on a blind date following a fifty-year marriage.
The two wise women sometimes bring different perspectives, but they fully agree about what OSJM participants are seeking: connection.
By offering an old-fashioned hive mind approach to facilitating such possibilities, OSJM borrows aspects from the traditional shidduch model of matchmaking, listening to their gut – arriving at a place where two participants strike them as a match.
In a modern twist, Cohodes and Weisberg follow the cues from OSJM participants, leaving them to determine their own relationship goals, whether it’s marriage or a companion for dinner dates.
Cohodes said she views it as an honor to be entrusted with the private information participants share about their lives and wishes. She is impressed by the lifelong learning she sees in participants who are looking to make the most of the rest of their life by sharing it with someone new.
“Seniors know more about what they want and don’t want,” Cohodes said. Their priorities have shifted from earlier phases in their lives, which often brings about a corresponding open-mindedness about who their new partner might be.
Matchmaking is an ancient Jewish tradition, one that recognizes the unpredictability and variability in bringing together two people for the potential of a shared future.
“Just like in cooking, romance is chemistry,” said Weisberg. “You can know a lot about each ingredient, but it’s always a bit of an experiment when you put them together to create something new.”
OSJM can’t guarantee outcomes, but it aims to offer participants the chance to meet another person who might just be the missing ingredient in a recipe for a more meaningful life.
OSJM’s online home, JMatchmaking, is a group for Jewish singles 65+ in Minnesota. Seniors looking for a match, or those helping an interested senior, are all welcome.
I hope you publicize your dating venture in the bulletins of the Twin Cities synagogues and at the St. Paul and Minneapolis JCCs. I’d be quite surprised if the median demographic of tcJewfolk’s readership is anywhere near 65. As a late 70s male and fairly computer literate, I, as do many of my peers, avoid Facebook, Instagram, Tick Tock, etc.
To reach those of “an age” you really have to think about the media, they use, particularly older men.
I may be mistaken, but I recall a Pew study completed a few years ago, that cited the disparity in numbers of elderly Jewish women versus men. I think, of those tabulated, women outnumbered men by a ratio of four to one.
As I widower for sixteen plus years, I can attest to the fact that meeting someone in my and their latter years that meets the needs and desires of both is very difficult. When my soon-to-be 9-year old grandson was born, I swore off dating; particularly women who are the friends of my friends’ wives. Oh, the stories I won’t tell, but thinking about them always brings me a good chuckle. I won’t mention the first date with a woman who opened our conversation over dinner with, “If we get married, will you be able to add me to your medical insurance supplemental plan?
That’s a good point, Stephen Rosenthal.