Have you ever seen a movie or read a book a second time and wanted to shout out to the ‘good guy’ “Don’t open the car door – it’ll explode!”
You knew he was going to open it and you knew there was nothing you could do to change the outcome.
But unlike books and movies, history doesn’t have to repeat itself.
Provided you learn from the mistakes made by our ancestors.
Baseless hatred (sinat chinam) among the Jews of Eretz Yisrael is what we are told caused the destruction of the Temple. In-fighting stopped the Jews of the time uniting against the Romans who were laying siege to the holy city of Jerusalem.
Some wanted to play for time; they still had storehouses of food, and if necessary, they would surrender later to the Romans and salvage what they could of the Jewish homeland.
But the zealots were determined to fight it out with the enemy to the bitter end. There was no submitting to Rome in any way. They killed thousands of Jews who they believed were collaborating with the Romans.
As time went by and they saw they hadn’t convinced their fellow Jews they set fire to the storehouses burning all the food that was left. They believed this would force their fellow Jews to fight and not sit around complacently.
But it just ignited more hatred and the Romans took advantage of the split in the Jewish people and on the 17th Tammuz (which this year is on Thursday, July 2), they broke through the walls of Jerusalem.
Neighborhood by neighborhood, street by street, the heavily armed Romans stormed through Jerusalem, slaughtering everyone as they went. Thousands of Jews were already dead, killed by their fellow countrymen. The rest were weak and starving because their burnt-out storehouses, which could have provided them with energy to fight on, just mocked their helplessness.
The book of Eicha (Lamentations) is read on the Fast of the 9th of Av, the day the Romans reached the Temple and set it on fire. It has horrifically graphic details of the suffering of the Jews of Jerusalem, as they dropped dead in the streets from hunger, thirst, and the Roman sword.
The Three Weeks between the two Fasts of 17th Tammuz and the 9th Av are the saddest in the Jewish calendar. Not just because of what our enemies did to us, but perhaps even more because of what we did to ourselves and each other.
The 9th Av is also the day that the 12 spies came back from touring the Land of Israel with the discouraging report that they would never be able to conquer the land. For this they were condemned to spend another 40 years wandering in the desert until the males of that generation had died. Another self-inflicted disaster. Did they really think that G-d had brought them this far with incredible miracles just to send them to a land to be killed?
The Jewish people are described as a stiff-necked nation. We have always been argumentative. Prophets argued with G-d. The Talmud is full of discussions and arguments between our sages. Go into any yeshiva, and the noise of the boys discussing and debating their point can be deafening.
That isn’t the problem.
But when the arguments turn into fights, and the words into threats, our strength becomes our downfall.
Many have pointed out that the weeks before October 7th were ablaze with political infighting here in Israel over a proposed judicial reform.
- It’s OK to have different political outlooks – but keep the arguments civil.
- Listen to the other side’s point of view – whether it’s about religion, politics or child rearing. Everyone likes to feel heard even if not agreed with.
The opposite of Sinat chinam is ahavat chinam – loosely translated as liking someone or being nice to someone for no particular reason.
- Make a point of greeting or at least smiling at someone you usually avoid.
- Compliment or congratulate someone who spoke well / wrote a great article even if you add that you don’t agree with what he said.
If sinat chinam destroyed the Temple then hopefully ahavat chinam will help rebuild it…and will also herald the arrival of the Moshiach.